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Monday, 8 September 2008

Dealing With Your Emotions With Mesothelioma

Mesothelioma: a form of cancer that affects the protective linings of the lungs, the heart, or the abdominal organs, most often brought about by exposure to asbestos. It's bad enough just trying to pronounce it and figure out exactly what it is - but when you're told that you have it, the world seems to crumble around you. The normal life you've been leading is about to change dramatically, and you're told there isn't much you can do but sit back and let it happen. You'll have to come to terms with it yourself, and then help your family and friends to do the same. There will be appointments to keep, important matters to discuss with loved ones, treatment decisions to research. Due to all this, your daily routine will be vastly different. It seems like a lot to swallow all at once, and you may wonder if you can get through all that's expected of you in the coming months.
Since everyone reacts differently to shocking news, it's hard to tell exactly how you'll respond at first. You'll inevitably experience a range of emotions after your diagnosis, including:
Shock or disbeliefMesothelioma is a disease that "lies in wait" for a very long time. Your exposure to carcinogenic asbestos fibers most likely occurred anywhere from twenty to fifty years ago, so you're likely to be completely unprepared for someone to tell you that it's caused you to develop cancer. You may doubt the diagnosis, especially if you don't feel bad physically. And it's very normal when you're told that you have a life-threatening illness for your brain to go into automatic "denial mode."
Anxiety and fearYour diagnosis brings with it a whole host of things to be afraid of. People tend to fear the unknown, and this is a whole new experience that, up until this point, you know nothing about. You may fear suffering or pain, fear becoming a burden on loved ones, or whether you'll be able to tie up all your loose ends "just in case." You may question your own ability - and the ability of your family - to cope effectively with cancer and all that it brings.
GuiltYou may feel guilty, for one reason or another. Even though the Mesothelioma is by no means your fault, you may feel that you should have done something, somehow, to prevent it. Or that you should have known about it sooner. You might think of your family and all the pain that they'll feel because of your diagnosis, and feel personally responsible.
DepressionIn situations like these, a person feels a lot of personal grief and self-pity, which can lead to immense sadness, even making you depressed. The uncertainty and precariousness of your situation can darken your vision of the future.
AngerA certain amount of anger is definitely to be expected, and you may not even be able to pinpoint exactly why you're angry or who you're angry with. You might feel like lashing out at those around you, when really, it's not them you're mad at; it's only that you're trying to vent your frustrations.
So what can you do to cope with this barrage of feelings that's bombarding you? First, give yourself some time. You can't be expected to be diagnosed with a major life-changing illness and be fine with it, and accepting of it, just like that. It may take you a little while to absorb the news, the weight of it, to wrap your mind around the concept ... and that's fine. It's important during the first stages to take time for yourself - if you need to be alone, be alone for a while. You'll instinctively know what you need to do to start coping, so do it!

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